


Mythical Beasts and Where to Find Them

by Esperata



Category: Star Trek: The Original Series
Genre: Banter, Gen, Secrets, Spones if you squint, Surprises
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-01
Updated: 2020-04-01
Packaged: 2021-02-28 19:36:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,052
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23412466
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Esperata/pseuds/Esperata
Summary: Captain Kirk suspects there's something suspicious going on but his crew wouldn't keep anything from him, right?
Relationships: James T. Kirk & Leonard "Bones" McCoy & Spock
Comments: 8
Kudos: 24





	Mythical Beasts and Where to Find Them

**Author's Note:**

  * For [StellarLibraryLady](https://archiveofourown.org/users/StellarLibraryLady/gifts).



> Something fun for your birthday!

The first sign Kirk had of anything unusual going on was when he saw Nurse Chapel perform a 180° turn to head back into sickbay when she saw him approaching. He frowned at the behaviour but didn’t otherwise react, waiting until he reached the entrance himself to see if there was anything obviously amiss. It was entirely possible after all that she’d merely forgotten something. Perhaps a message for McCoy prompted by the sight of the captain. Or maybe he’d even reminded her to check her make-up in preparation for seeing someone almost as desirable later.

Still, when he stepped through the door he couldn’t help but glance about him for the answer to the puzzling behaviour. All he saw was Christine standing poised and collected by her desk, smile at the ready to welcome him.

“Captain. Is there anything I can help you with?”

“No…” he hesitated briefly, wondering if it would be polite to call her on her seemingly strange behaviour. “I was just stopping by to see if McCoy wanted to join me for lunch. Is he about?”

Ordinarily Bones would have recognised his voice by now and come blustering over to find out whether he was in fact injured or just making a nuisance of himself. Unless he was conducting a private conference in his office of course but Kirk could easily see that doorway was standing open.

Christine clearly caught his glance and threw a quick look that way herself.

“Doctor McCoy’s in the isolation room,” she explained. “He’ll be out in a moment.”

“The isolation room?” He fixed his piercing gaze on her with a serious expression. “I wasn’t aware we had any patients in quarantine?”

“Oh no! No!” Her calm demeanour fell away as she realised the alarm her statement had caused. “There isn’t anyone in there. Well, no crewperson anyway. Although obviously Doctor McCoy’s in there.”

“But why?” he interrupted her frantic babbling.

“Well… to test it naturally. Regulations state the isolation chambers’ seal must be periodically tested. Especially if they’ve been used extensively.”

“Oh.”

As Kirk mulled that over, remembering reading something along those lines when he first read up on his new command, he heard the hiss of the door seal opening and looked up to see McCoy stepping out.

“Everything reads ok in there,” he commented to the nurse, eyes apparently glued to his tricorder still. “All okay out here? Oh! Hello Jim.”

The relaxed tone almost startled Kirk, he was so used to dealing with a grumpy physician of late, but then he relaxed and grinned back. Why shouldn’t McCoy be relaxed? After a rough few months everything was finally running ship-shape and Bristol fashion. It was even peaceful enough for him to get on top of routine maintenance.

“Morning Bones. Just come to see if you wanted to get some lunch?”

Jim caught the quick glance from doctor to nurse as he seemingly checked he had permission to leave and he was suddenly reminded of Chapel’s almost exit he’d caught earlier. It occurred to him she might have been playing a trick on McCoy by disappearing to catch him by surprise when he emerged. If so, the sight of her commanding officer would obviously have stifled such high spirits. Although Jim would have happily joined in such a game if she’d asked.

“I’ll mind sickbay Doctor,” she confirmed placidly. “In case anyone stops by.”

“Good. Thank you.”

McCoy immediately started for the doorway and Jim actually had to jog to catch up.

“Woah, you must be hungry.”

“Just don’t want to be gone too long,” he countered with a more familiar gruffness.

They were both halted as their exit was blocked by another familiar figure trying to enter. McCoy reeled back to avoid a collision and the near miss obviously startled the Vulcan as well since he blinked at them. Jim also caught an unexpected widening of McCoy’s eyes as he stared in rather more alarm than was warranted at Spock before his own gaze noticed the baffling object Spock was carrying.

“Spock,” he spoke slowly, eyes squinting to see if that made a difference to what he was seeing. “What is that in your hands?”

“This?” Spock looked down as well, as if to remind himself what it actually was. Then his gaze flickered almost imperceptibly to McCoy before refocusing on Jim. “This is a bowl of food.”

Jim found himself nodding in response although it still didn’t answer the real issue. The food didn’t look like anything any of them would usually eat. If he was back home in Iowa then he’d say it was something meant for the pigs. Certainly it wasn’t anything a vegetarian like Spock would be eating.

“And why are you carrying that bowl of food to sickbay?” he pressed, suddenly getting the sense there was a whole lot more going on here that he hadn’t spotted yet. He had the pieces though. He just needed to turn them about until the picture appeared.

“Because…” Spock actually hesitated, causing Jim to switch into high analysis mode. “Doctor McCoy asked for it.”

“Yeah,” Bones suddenly broke into the conversation, snatching the bowl from Spock’s unresisting hands and glaring defiantly at Jim. Who met his fierce gaze with a stubborn one of his own.

“You really were hungry then, getting Spock to fetch lunch for you. Well,” -he gestured magnanimously- “Don’t stand on ceremony.”

To his credit, McCoy could bluff with the very best of them and would never back down from a challenge. It was one of the qualities Jim admired most in him. Which made him wonder if he shouldn’t have pushed the man as he saw him quite aggressively grab a wobbling piece of disgusting meat product and lift it to his mouth.

His play worked beautifully however as Spock’s arm darted forward to grasp the man’s wrist before it could complete the manoeuvre.

“Leonard no! The amount of fat and indigestible material in that dish could cause you severe stomach problems. I cannot allow you to eat it.”

“Dammit Spock! A couple of bites wouldn’t have hurt!”

Despite his remonstration Jim noted that he very quickly dropped the quivering piece.

“Gentlmen.” He folded his arms to try and convey captainly displeasure while internally giggling like a school boy. “I suggest you explain exactly what is going on around here.”

He watched in amusement as Spock cast his gaze to McCoy, who looked in appeal back to Christine, who merely folded her arms in her own matronly fashion, leaving him no recourse but to turn appealing eyes back to Spock. Spock clearly felt compelled to act under the pitiful expression and stiffened his spine.

“Captain. As senior officer I believe the blame lies with me.”

“No, no,” Bones interrupted immediately. “I’m the chief medical officer. This falls under my jurisdiction. If anyone’s going to get punished it should be me.”

“You may have had the power of veto Doctor, yet the active decision rested with me.”

“And if it turns out to be punishment worthy then I should have used that power of veto so that brings it back to me.”

“Gentlemen,” Kirk interrupted again, hands raised as both attention seeking and a warding gesture to halt any fight. “Why don’t you just tell me what it is so I can decide if its punishment worthy or not?”

They shared a gaze whereby they clearly agreed to put aside their battle for now in favour of following captain’s orders. It was a look Jim was quite familiar with. McCoy then spun about and marched back to the isolation room, leading the others behind him.

As the door was opened, Jim braced himself for what he might see. Some horrific science experiment perhaps. A victim of some horrific ailment being hidden away while the science officers devoted unapproved resources to help. Either seemed equally likely. What he actually saw therefore totally stunned him until he couldn’t help but laugh with relief.

Shuffling across the floor, on four short legs almost hidden by a coat of long fur, was a recognisable unicorn dog.

“I thought this boy died? Bones?”

“So did I.” He shrugged. “Then when Spock had it on the dissection table ready to examine he realised it was in a state of shock, or severe hibernation. A bit of TLC and he perked right up.”

The dog had been sniffing Jim’s boot and now turned its hopeful face up to him, tail wagging in greeting. He couldn’t help but grin as he bent down to pet it carefully.

“But I don’t understand. Why didn’t you just tell me? Why lock it away in here?”

Behind him, McCoy was shifting awkwardly and Spock took it upon himself to answer.

“In the act of nursing the animal back to health, Doctor McCoy and several of the nurses have formed an emotional bond with it. Given the restriction of pets allowed on board, they were hesitant about informing you because regulations state it would need to be removed.”

“And you Spock?” Jim stood up to meet his gaze with fond amusement. “What prompted you to overlook the regulations this time?”

Spock very determinedly kept his gaze off where McCoy was blushing next to him although a faint green tinge did highlight his cheeks.

“There is no regulation that allows me to remove a patient from the doctor’s care. While the animal had not been declared fit, it would be unethical to remove it.”

“Uh huh,” Jim agreed teasingly before turning his own gaze down to the engaging animal.

“Well I don’t doubt you’re right about the regulations Mister Spock. No pets are allowed on board. Can you imagine the chaos if everyone was allowed to bring their cat, dog, iguana, bird or whatever?”

“Indeed.”

“However, I believe Doctor McCoy has overlooked one exemption allowed from a medical standpoint.”

He threw a challenging look his CMO’s way and watched as his face reflected his flickering thoughts: confusion, concentration and triumphant conclusion.

“An emotional support animal!”

“Exactly. Absolutely vital to the mental wellbeing of some people.”

“If you can nominate any crew members who would benefit from such a support animal?” Spock put in almost eagerly even as McCoy nodded excitedly.

“There’s several who could be candidates.”

“He should stay here in sickbay though,” Christine added. “Where there’ll always be someone around to care for him and where he’ll be accessible when needed.”

“That sounds like a wonderful plan.” Jim grinned. “Though I’d have no objection for him to be taken for walks for his own wellbeing.”

“Thanks Jim.”

“It is a welcome solution,” Spock agreed.

“Excellent.” Jim clapped his hands together. “Now can we please head to lunch? I’m starving. And…” he hesitated as he looked down again at the little dog. “What’s his name?”

The question caused McCoy again to shift in embarrassment and this time Spock too took on the appearance of a manikin. It fell to Christine to answer.

“We called him Bones,” she told him.

It took a second but then Jim burst out laughing. He turned to see McCoy glaring and couldn’t help but laugh more.

“Oh that’s priceless.” He finally wiped his eyes and looked down to the dog who was excitedly wagging its tail at his hilarity. “And I bet you’re a good boy Bones aren’t you? Better tempered than your namesake I’ll wager.”

“Yes, yes, very funny.” McCoy stomped away towards the sickbay exit. “Did you want to get lunch or not.”

Spock fell in behind the doctor and, after sharing a final conspiratorial look with Nurse Chapel, Jim followed. As he reached the doorway though he turned and whistled briskly.

“Here Bones!”

The short dog padded its way quickly over to him whole body swaying with the energy of its tail wag.

“Good boy!” he praised.

McCoy rolled his eyes but didn’t dignify the performance with a response, instead holding his head high and stalking the corridor towards the mess. Jim was close enough to catch Spock’s response however as he leant in to whisper to McCoy.

“You are a good boy too Doctor.”

Jim stifled his giggles as he saw McCoy blush scarlet and turned his happy grin onto the oblivious dog at his heels. Yes, this one would make a fine addition to their crew.

**Author's Note:**

> In response to your comment: Pets would be an impractical gift on a Starship, but the crew would instantly fall in love with them. The unicorn dog would've been cute just being glimpsed occasionally. It would've given a homey feel to the series and could've been an endearing part of it as much as Chekov's accent or Spock and McCoy's banter.


End file.
